Monday, July 14, 2008

tongue tied

Have their been times when you have opened your mouth said something that you think will be understood but then on reflection you want to bring back as quickly as possible but you can't and it's out there haunting the universe forever?

Has this happened to anyone or is it just me?

(ok - the first question is badly worded but I hope you get my meaning.)

I have always had the habit of saying things that sometimes I just wish I hadn't. Trouble is I say it with such conviction that it may carry more weight than I had intended.

An incident occurred over the weekend that I keep thinking about.

I was musing out loud to my friend K about how different people discuss the same issue. Actually the word I think I used was gossip. This was never my intention to imply that they were gossiping. They were in fact discussing a fairly intense issue.

What fascinated me was not so much what they were discussing but more how body language, tone of voice, volume and emphasis changes according to the people who are leading the discussion. I am always amazed how different group of people react to the same information. I observe my staffroom with the same amount of interest, in fact any group of people who have some diametrically opposed people.

When I tried to explain this I think I stumbled over my choice of words and made it sound as if I didn't approve of what they were saying.

What I would like to have happen is the conversation that I had with K about this situation to be removed from existence and then replaced with a more carefully worded discussion that really showed my intention.

Now that I have that out of my system I can get on with it.

1 comment:

Laura Jane said...

Yes - a 'rewind, take two' button would be very useful somedays wouldn't it?

When hearing this from others one never knows if its a genuine moment of inexpressiveness, or a passive aggressive person having a 'go' slyly disguised as a badly worded explanation/musing.

I had a full-on retaliation at someone a few weeks ago when I suspected (later supported by witnesses)that someone was treating me in a very condescending manner. I snapped I'm afraid. Didn't hurt her a bit, but I was buggered if I was gonna take that bullshit lying down. She tried hard to backpedal, to no avail. Serves her right.

My sympathies.