A little while ago I won a competition run by Vanessa. She sent me Quirkyalone: a manifesto for uncompromising romantics a book by Sasha Cagen.
I have just finished reading it this week and would like to report about it. I hope you don't mind.
I related to many parts of the book. I am a quirkyalone and I am very proud to be one.
I wish there was another name I could call myself as I find having to explain what it means tiresome. But I will quote from the book (page 5)
"Quirky is human. It's real. It's unintentional difference, being distinctive without artifice........ "Quirky is about being yourself, but it's not aggressive and it should not harm others."
(page 6) Alone should be seen "as a declaration of independence, a willingness to step out from the crowd to follow one;s own instincts."
"Putting quirky together with alone implies the ability to enjoy one's aloneness, whether one is single or not."
What I particularly liked about this book is that it put into words everything that I feel about my life. I am single and I am proud of it. I am not opposed to relationships, or set ups, blind dates, online dating etc. What I am opposed to is the idea that you HAVE to be in a relationship because everyone expects it. I am opposed to the idea of 'settling'.
I have many friends and family who are in fantastic relationships, long and short term. That's what I would like for myself but not at any cost. For too long I have struggled with this whole idea that I needed to be in a relationship to be complete. Many times I have found myself arching in aggression when I have been accused of being too picky etc. Now I might respond differently.
I have realised that I am uncompromising and that I am one unique individual.
I always knew this but I have never really acknowledged it.
Thank you Vanessa for allowing me the time and space to remind myself of who I am.